What if?

What if I could pretend that when you fought I didn't notice.
What if the lies that you told weren't so obvious.
If I could look the other way I would. Believe me.
You think that I want to have to explain this to them?
Why mom and dad never sit together anymore?
And why dinner seems so fake..
Like if you sat watching long enough their smiles would crack and the pointless wall to spare our feelings could finally break down.
What if everything you said had no effect. I'll let you in on something...it does.

This isn't working..

You stare at me trying to find a crack in my composure.
So that you can pretend to relate.
I want to shut you out to deal with this on my own.
But your always going to be right out side the door, around the corner.
Waiting for the day when you can laugh and act like everything is okay.
What if I don't want that day to come when we can all be happy again.
The pain that I'm holding in will still linger in the shadows.
It's not going to go away.
I'm sorry for being "dramatic".